BREAKING: FAU To Turn Old Starbucks Into Another Starbucks

Sources are now confirming that FAU has developed plans to turn the old Starbucks site on the Breezeway into another Starbucks. Customers were shocked to see the old Starbucks close, only to have an improved location open adjacent to it. Despite the change in position, this has not affected the immense amount of student traffic the new Starbucks can receive at any given time. 

“We figured the crowd of people lined up for coffee would disappear if we moved stores,” explained store manager Alexandra Williams, as she tended to the rapidly-growing crowd in the new Starbucks. “Unfortunately, we weren’t able to throw them off and they somehow managed to find the new location right next door. Opening another one would really help.”

Many students agree with the decision. “What else would they put there anyway?” questioned frequent Starbucks-goer Lucille Adams. “Some other low-grade coffee shop or even anything remotely unique? Ridiculous.”

At press time, close sources revealed that the Pollo Tropical rumored to open in the food court has actually been another Starbucks the whole time.