Campus Rec Set To Run In Next Presidential Election, “Dumptruck 2024”
A lot has happened at FAU this past week. Owlsley was found with 10lbs of cocaine, and his antisemitic tweets about “nipple Yamakas” resurfaced. FAU…
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President Kelly Declares Campus-Wide Emergency Forcing Students To Attend Sporting Events
Campus Governor Almost Impeached After Dining Alone At Arby’s One Too Many Times
Who The Fuck Is The Student Body President?
Breaking: Trump Pays Owlsley Hush Money For Sexual Favors
4 Reasons Why FAU Student Government More Disappointing Than A Federal Shutdown
Confused FAU President John Kelly Prepares Himself for New Job as White House Chief of Staff
Mike Pence to Visit FAU, Theatre Dept to Burn All Meaningful Material
President-Elect Trump Denies Ever Running for President
Liberal Voter Surprised to Still Be Alive After Trump Wins Election
On Wednesday morning, liberal voter Samantha Jones woke up in her Ft. Lauderdale house, shocked to find herself still alive with the rest of the…