Engineering Student Builds Jetpack, Injures Three

In the pre-dawn hours, atop Engineering East’s Rooftop Garden, a student begins his maiden voyage using his homemade Jetpack, named The Way. 

Prior to said flight, Hoot reporters sat down with the student, Junior Simon Jamsion, on his creation. “Well, what with quarantine, I’ve been watching a lot of the Mandalorian,” shouted Jamison some 30 feet away from the socially distanced and mask wearing Hoot reporters. “And, I have to tell you, Mando was right: I really had to get me one of those jetpacks. Having spent quite some time, and almost all of my Pell Grant, I have created it. This,” Jamison said pointing to the jetpack,” is The Way.” 

Jamison alerted our Hoot correspondents to the sunrise liftoff, and, on that fateful morning, reporters were there. Jamison leapt into the sky and ignited The Way which carried him aloft…for seventeen seconds, after which Jamison’s fuel ran thin and he plummeted from the sky. Luckily, three Engineering students were leaving EE’s workshops at that time, and these students cushioned Jamison’s fall. The four of them were taken to the clinic by onsite FAUPD officers. 

At presstime, Jamison and the three other Engineering students are reported as being in stable conditions, but Jamison was upset that he could not “upgrade” his broken leg to a trendy cybernetic augment, saying “I mean the original Cyberpunk Tabletop took place in 2020! I should be able to Neuromancer it up already!”

While the Hoot does not condone actions that may, or may not, break FAA regulations, if someone were to perfect Jamison’s jetpack designs, a certain news agency would pay handsomely for those plans.