Olivia Bolgalivia, recent Master’s graduate, was proud to announce on Saturday that her newfound Linguistics degree and love of expletives had made a beautiful marriage. This girl knows ALL the curse words, of all time, ever. “I actually did my dissertation on the impact of expletives in the Urban Dictionary and its impact on power structures within different cultures,” Bolgalivia reported.
Interviews from within the department revealed that the faculty was quite supportive of the venture. Some professors even convinced Bolgalivia to not limit herself to simple expletives but to explore the Urban Dictionaries of many different countries. “At first, a few of my more conservative professors and the department advising officer were shocked. But after two hours of my presentation, they were floored by the implications of the Italian version of the Cleveland Steamer (Venetian Squealer) and the Prussian-Alaskan Pipeline upon the general population of Bulgaria.” stated a proud Bolgalivia.
The FAU Department of Linguistics is proud to support students who represent the growing number of debt-riddled adults with seemingly useless degrees. “I even said to my mother in 2014, ‘Yes, I know that I might end up $60,000 in debt but if I get to learn every curse word in the world then it is totally worth it,’” Bolgalivia asserted.
Think you’ve got what it takes to join us? WE WANT YOU!
Apply today to join the hottest squad on campus.
LINK: https://goo.gl/ro7bVC (DEADLINE APRIL 16)