FAU Student Uses SpaghettiOs for Interpretive Essay

On Monday morning, FAU senior Alexander Jones turned in his Aesthetics and Art Theory essay which was created exclusively with SpaghettiOs. Jones reportedly worked on the essay for weeks, visiting every Publix in Boca Raton to get his hands on enough noodles to make a 17-page essay. Unfortunately, Jones turned in the hard copy to a fit of laughs by the class, as he foolishly did not use Campbell’s® Condensed Chicken Alphabet Soup like the rest of the students.

“I know I should have used the Alphabet Soup, but this was me showcasing the true brutal nature of man, which can only be expressed through SpaghettiOs,” Jones said passionately through tears. “Look at this essay. This is what aesthetics and art theory are all about. This is what theses and dissertations are made out of!”

“OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO,” said Jones, quoting his essay while dropping noodle rings onto the ground.

At press time, Jones was seen sobbing into a noodle-soaked piece of paper at the Arts and Letters building. When asked if he had any regrets, Jones wiped the tears from his face with his “B-” essay and muttered, “I should have used less sauce. It stings my eyes.”