Tom Welch, an FAU senior, got a real surprise Tuesday morning when he went to pick up his order at the Einstein Bagels in the FAU food court. “She called me Tom. She actually said my name correctly. I will never forget it. She said Tom. Tom.” Tom was startled. “Usually they say my name like ‘Toom’. Sometimes they make it two syllables. I didn’t even know that it was possible, but they did it somehow.”
At one point, Tom even started worrying for the employees of the FAU food court. “As a Biology major, I began to suspect that a pollutant in the staff’s water supply was causing memory loss because, get this,” he said, leaning in close as if telling a secret, “the same employee from one day would still not get my name right the next day.” Tom then sat back in his chair to let this surprising development sink in.
“It took me three years of extensive research to find out that there was nothing in the water. I should’ve known. Flint’s got us beat there.”
But just a month after he had given up hope, a miracle happened. “When the girl- I think her name is Janelle or Janeeka, something funky- when she got my name right yesterday for the first time in four years… it was like God, man. It was like God.” Tom then revealed that he is dropping his Biology major to do Christian missionary work in Chad. “If that wasn’t a sign, then I don’t know what is.”