Local Former Gifted Kid Accepts Invitation To Honors Society Just To Feel Something

This past Monday, a local former gifted kid accepted an invitation to an honors society at FAU just to feel something. It is common knowledge amongst former gifted students, and those who are unfortunate enough to be around them for more than five minutes, that they experienced a difficult time as students and now crave validation in their adult lives. As college students, however, such validation is hard to come by with a natural lack of personal connection to professors. This is where the honors societies come in.

“I don’t even know what the honors society is about,” Remarked the local former gifted kid Nicole Jones. “They just keep telling me how smart and special I am for being invited to such a prestigious organization, and honestly? That’s all I need to know.”

Another former gifted kid testified to the absolute dopamine rush these societies provide for such a troubled group of young people. “I totally understand the feeling,” claimed fellow emotionally troubled former gifted student Michael Williams. “Every time I pay a registration fee I feel as though I’ve gained back a part of myself I never knew I’d lost.”

At press time it was revealed that, in order to combat former gifted students bankrupting themselves joining honors societies, the Counseling and Psychological Services Center at FAU would begin offering a service to tell these former gifted students that they’re doing a good job.