Righteous TA Can’t Resist Reminding You She Already Got Her Degree
Organic Chemistry I teacher assistant Debra Garrison graduated from Palm Beach State, and she doesn’t let anyone forget it. A degree she wears like a…
Student Drops Out After Receiving Overly Passive-Aggressive Discussion Board Reply
On Wednesday morning, freshman Stephanie White dropped out of FAU after receiving an extremely passive-aggressive discussion board reply. The response reportedly sent shockwaves across White’s…
Outtakes Jamaican Beef Patty Offended Students Keep Calling It An Empanada
After being commonly referred to as an empanada by students across campus, an Outtakes Jamaican beef patty is taking a firm stand against this injustice….
Parking Enforcement Officer Boots Another Parking Enforcement Officer; No Mercy In These Streets
Absolute tragedy struck Tuesday morning when Jim Parker, seasoned parking enforcement officer of three years, had his golf cart booted by another PEO for parking in…
Man Mansplains Man How Men Shouldn’t Mansplain
At a social gathering held on Sunday evening, sophomore Sociology major Isaiah Miller mansplained fellow guest Seamus Flynn how men should not mansplain. Miller reportedly…
Local FAU Student Comes Out As Republican
On Monday morning, FAU sophomore Brad Dixon bravely came out to his roommates and revealed that he politically identifies as a Republican. Dixon reportedly broke…
FAU Unveils New Major: Wrecking Noobs On Fortnite
On Friday morning, Florida Atlantic University announced that it would finally be welcoming the addition of a brand new major: Wrecking Noobs On Fortnite. This…
Sophomore Cries Into Smirnoff Ice; Sadly Whispers, “I Miss Club Boca”
With the loss of his most beloved Club Boca still bothering him, sophomore Economics major Holden Chavez cried into a stiff glass of Smirnoff Ice…
After Expensive Master’s Degree, Linguistics Major Knows ALL The Curse Words
Olivia Bolgalivia, recent Master’s graduate, was proud to announce on Saturday that her newfound Linguistics degree and love of expletives had made a beautiful marriage….
An Open Letter From Your Online Homework: “You Don’t Do Me Like You Used To”
Dearest Z12345678, I am writing you for one simple reason: You just don’t do me like you used to. You aren’t consistent anymore. You don’t…