The Hoot
  • Home
  • News
  • Sports
  • Campus Life
  • Commuter Life
  • Animals
  • Listicles
  • Alumni
  • Op-eds
  • About Us
    • Staff
    • Hoot Alumni
    • Join Us!
  • Merch

Campus Life, News March 5, 2021

English Honors Society Membership Down: “No One Wants To Be An STD”

It’s that time of the year again, folks, when honors society across FAU’s campuses open admissions and try to get new entrants to pay exorbitant…


Campus Life March 1, 2021

FAU Soon To Offer HTP1101, “How to Park,” As A Summer Course

Are you one of the many students who cheated on their permit test and never actually learned the rules of the road? Instead of spending…


Animals, News February 24, 2021

How To Tell Which FAU Iguanas Have Human Souls Trapped Inside Them

As more students return to in-person classes on campus, a new issue is coming to light: Campus Iguanas. While we already know Green Iguanas are…


Campus Life February 22, 2021

FAU Band: “We Could’ve Given A Better Halftime Show Than The Weeknd.”

Dr. Kyle Prescott and Dr. Marc Decker, director and associate director, respectively, of the FAU Marching Band, released a statement that their athletic band could’ve…


Alumni, News February 17, 2021

FAU Alumni Association Asks For FAU Love Stories, Receive Blackmail From Disgruntled Exes Instead

The weeks leading up to Valentine’s Day are always a bit more gloomy for single folks than normal. To add salt to the wound, The…


News February 15, 2021

FAU High Schoolers Declared “Too Self-Aware”, Program To Be Cancelled

This morning it has been revealed that FAU High School has declared their students “too self-aware” and have decided to cancel the program entirely for…


Campus Life February 11, 2021

Engineering Student Builds Jetpack, Injures Three

In the pre-dawn hours, atop Engineering East’s Rooftop Garden, a student begins his maiden voyage using his homemade Jetpack, named The Way.  Prior to said…


Campus Life, News February 5, 2021

FAU Weekly Random COVID-19 Testing Revealed To Be Program To Secretly Probe Students

This past weekend, it had been revealed that the brand new FAU weekly random COVID-19 testing program was actually a tactic being used by the…


News February 3, 2021

FAU High School The Only School In The County To Accept Barron Trump

As the Trump family begins to settle into their Mar-a-Lago residence, new information about their future plans continue to be discovered. The Hoot has recently…


News, Open Letters February 1, 2021

I’m Sorry, But The FAU Pep Band Sounds Like Dying Horses

Multiple reports this afternoon have come across The Hoot tip line regarding FAU’s pep band – known for playing at every basketball game this season….


« 1 2 3 4 5 … 54 »

Follow us on Facebook

Popular Posts

  • Student Too Cool To Join Organizations Hasn’t Spoken To Anyone In Three Years posted on April 5, 2019
  • Owlsley Demands Extended Summer Break As Part Of Contract Renewal posted on July 30, 2018
  • Sorority Girl Uses PAM for Tanning Oil to Get That Golden Brown Cookie Look posted on March 5, 2018
  • Breaking: Trump Pays Owlsley Hush Money For Sexual Favors posted on September 14, 2018

Random Post

February 3, 2021

FAU High School The Only School In The County To Accept Barron Trump


The Hoot
The Hoot

The Hoot is a Florida Atlantic University satirical news source. Completely independent and student-run.

The Hoot is in no way associated with Florida Atlantic University. All published content is meant solely for entertainment purposes.
Facebooktwittertumblrinstagram
Tags
Breezeway Canvas Carrie Burgendorf Christmas Class Commuter Commuters Depression Elections Falcon Hawkmoon FAU Finals Finals Week financial aid Florida Atlantic University Football Freshman Graduation Halloween Hillel Hurricane Lane Kiffin Library Money netflix New Owlsley Parking President Kelly Professor Senior SGA Spoopy Spring Break Starbucks Student Students Student Union Syllabus Week Thanksgiving The Caf The Hoot Twitter Valentine's Day Wimberly Library

Copyright 2022 |