Absolute tragedy struck Tuesday morning when Jim Parker, seasoned parking enforcement officer of three years, had his golf cart booted by another PEO for parking in a blue parking zone. “I was gone for five minutes,” said Parker. “I went to the restroom, came back, and my cart had this tiny little boot on it. I didn’t even know we had those.”
“I thought I was safe,” Parker went on to say with a sullen look, “I thought I was immune. There is no mercy in these streets. There is nowhere to hide.”
Grant Morales, the PEO who booted Mr. Parker, was last seen ticketing a blue car for being in a green lot. “Blue means blue. Green is green. My word is law,” said Morales, writing out a stupidly irrelevant ticket while some freshman illegally parked their car in a handicap spot.