This week the Psychology Department has announced that they will be picking tributes for the first annual Skinner Box Games. All students who are Psychology or Neuroscience majors, as well as Psychology minors, are fair game to have their name put in for the Games. The purpose of the Games? Adjunct Professor, Dr. Tomasuski, says that, “it’s for research purposes of course. It’s been 70 years since the psychology field has come up with anything interesting, so why not try the Skinner Box again, it was successful the first time around.”
Undergrad researchers in Tomasuski’s lab have explained what the box is going to do. “It’s not like the Hunger Games… although that may be an interesting take. Anyway, you basically go into this giant arena – wait I mean box. Umm, okay so then you wait for the lab coordinator to count down to zero. After that if you find water, you get positively reinforced, so maybe you’ll get a treat or some money. But if you find the peroxide that looks like water, obviously you’ll be poisoned. The point is, you need to survive and you’ll be okay. Just try not to get poisoned.”
Honors Thesis student, Magdalene Everstone, says that if she completes the Games successfully it’ll help her get into FAU’s Psych Master’s program. “All undergrad really is, is getting that boost on your CV, what’s better than completing the Skinner Box? Especially after 4 years of psych electives, there is no way I can mess up operant conditioning.”
At press time, reporters viewed a great solemness as hundreds of students from the College of Science were separated into two groups, waiting for a disturbingly upbeat Theatre student waiting to pick the tributes for the Games.