After arriving at her Anatomy class Monday, FAU senior Jessica Frank found she was being required to purchase a textbook written by the professor and worth her entire month’s pay.
“Over the summer, I worked almost every day at Subway to save for this upcoming semester,” a dispirited Frank explained. “I wouldn’t be surprised if I have carpal tunnel in the future because of all the $5 footlongs I made.”
“Back in my day, we worked for our things and didn’t complain,” Frank’s Anatomy professor said in a statement. “These millennials want everything to be handed to them. These students ought to be grateful to be receiving such insightful knowledge from someone of my level of education.”
Frank was last spotted googling plasma donation clinics in the area while warming up her Cup Noodles. The senior had just previously left the bookstore carrying her fifty-page, paperback Anatomy textbook, with a single tear streaming down her cheek.