Sun Returns From Vacation

Reports are now confirming that after a week of heavy rainfall and flooding, the Sun has finally returned to South Florida from a pleasant vacation backpacking across Western Asia. It is not unusual for the Sun to embark on these intermittent vacations, sometimes disappearing for weeks at a time. “It’s always good to be back home in the Sunshine State,” the Sun said, appearing especially radiant after the much-needed respite. “I understand that people who came to visit Florida’s beaches over the weekend complained of my absence. But look, I’ve been in the business now for over four billion years, I’m middle-aged, and I think that I’m entitled to a vacation every now and again. Anyway, I hope they missed my rays because I’m about to blast their asses like never before. It is summer now, after all. Or is it? I can never tell these seasons apart.”