“I know you’ve heard this before,” said Dr. Jim Keads, Professor of Classical and Victorian Literature, “but gosh I wish it was like the old days.”
A popular statement uttered by the older generations at FAU and across the country, Baby Boomers wishing it was like when they were younger is not uncommon. However, Prof. Keads disagrees with all of those people. He doesn’t wish it was like when he was 15, he wishes it was like the old, old days.
“I think maybe 1830s England,” said Keads, “that’s really what I wish it were like. Wealth inequality, a lack of civil rights, the father being the head of the household, premarital sex was frowned upon while extramarital affairs were acceptable if you were a man, oh and only white men could vote. Gosh, doesn’t that sound lovely?”
After Hoot Reporters tried explaining to Prof. Keads that, no, the 1830s weren’t actually all that grand for everyone and that idealizing a past era as “golden” tends to overshadow many of that era’s social, political, and economic shortcomings, he dismissed the reporters replying, “oh piddle-paddle. It would’ve been great for me and people like me!”
At presstime, Prof. Keads was last seen in his office speaking in overly flowery language and grading midterms with a quill pen.
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